Dear Eliza

Your 50th birthday was amazing!

I’m back home now after travelling down with D, K and S for the weekend. A was with us too, I’m sure you’d introduced us on one of our post work drinks on George Street back in the day. Poor guy ended up having to wheel me about through the airport when my legs gave up - thankfully no duty free displays of vodka were harmed in this endevour!

Anyway, I’m on the sofa, feet up, cuppa next to me and thought I’d keep our promise and write more. Missy is sitting up on top of your chair, the yellow one in the window you always sat at when you were at mine. I love that I too have now joined the black cat owner gang! Oh that reminds me, W showed me the tattoo she got for you. It’s so adorable, a little black cat with FG above it for Ferret Girl, of course. Very cute and very special.

It was so great getting to talk to so many folk like W who know you just like I do. Hearing their versions of similar stories to mine and watching them enjoy listening to me tell my own stories of you. Watching movies, visiting the Hospital Club, crafting, travelling and fun nights out were common themes…also it seems I’m not alone in having fallen asleep on one of your sofas under those gorgeous cozy blankets, De talked about that being a fond memory of hers too and by her stories I can tell why you didn’t introduce us before, I’m really not sure I’d have kept up with you two on one of your nights out!!

Having said that, one thing everyone agreed on is how good your taste in friends is. De like so many others I met, like Ka and R (and her hubby whose name the margaritas have wiped from my memory) are just wonderful. I felt like I’d known them forever! And you know me, I’m not at my most confident meeting new people or social situations like this. In fact one of the stories I shared most was the first time we met, because that was a common theme for chats this weekend. Do you remember? You invited me to your birthday party; we’d only been chatting on twitter before then. I was so awkard that night and was a bit of a numpty but I’ll never forget how you just smiled at my nonsensical ramble, handed me a drink, smiled that adorable smile of yours and instantly became my friend. By the way, how cool is that quilt Ka made for you? The one with the heart shaped pumpkin - perfect!

Oh and how many people did you try to get to watch horror?? If I didn’t know you better I’d say you were a movie bully, missus! Only kidding.

You’ll be pleased to know there was a horror movie showing on the Friday night and the Wednesday night horror movie group have decided we’re going to bring that back and finish my horror movie education you started by working through our “to-watch” list.

Well I can’t mention movie education without talking about B. What a guy! It was like talking to you about movies, so much knowledge and enthusiasm for them….although what’s with him not liking musicals, sacrilege! By the way, he gave me a hat he made! In fact he gave a few of us hats he’d made. That was also very you. Giving out gifts to people he’d never even met before??? Very Eliza!

”Being more Eliza” has become D’s mantra and this weekend was 100% very VERY Eliza. Family, soooo much incredible food, old friends coming together, new friendships being formed, many, many drinks (not sure there was a surface not covered in prosecco bottles!), great music and so much laughter. It was even just great having a proper time to just enjoy sitting talking about you with friends I already know like Sy, G and S.

I can’t believe I was so worried about crying this weekend. Actually I can and I do admit had a couple of mini moments to myself and one slightly bigger bubble with M which I promised myself I wouldn’t do BUT you know me well enough to know that is pretty bloody impressive for me! To be honest there was no time for crying, there was too much fun and laughter being had. I mean, don’t get me wrong, every now and then you’d spot someone walking off to have a moment or returning to the room with slightly misty eyes but you’d have been so proud of how we all comforted each other and quickly got back to smiles and giggles…..sometimes by just reminding ourselves the names you’d call us if you caught us crying ;)

That reminds me, I met a few of your nieces and nephews. I was standing at one of the photo collages and getting a little emotional when J appeared and having never spoken to me before gave me a hug and started talking to me about how great you were. What a brilliant lad he is (btw G and I bought him a whisky at the hotel later on…he’d been talking about wanting to appreciate it more, G was sharing his whisky wisdom and in true “be more Eliza” style I figured this lesson needed to become more of a taste test…I hope you approve, it was just the one!) Where was I? Oh nieces and nephews. How are they all so grown up?! I met T first and as soon as she said who she was I immediately grabbed and hugged her before asking why she wasn’t still about 6!! They are all so lovely and you are right, they are incredibly cool too. They love you so much.

And I met the whole DW clan. Had a lovely chat (and hugs) with your sister-in-laws and M’s brothers are hilarous!! And very dangerous when I comes to making margaritas, don’t think there was a proper measure used once! A labelled it singing juice as we all started getting more confident in our ability to join in with the Rokaoke after one. So picture us all with beautiful brightly coloured cocktail glasses in hand as we started picking our songs from the playlist….S of course with her amazing voice had already picked a set list that could have lasted the whole night lol. In the end I think she sang four songs and was AMAZING! She did a brilliant duet of Shallow with Q who also had an amazing voice and is such a sweetheart. He was running us back and forth from the hotel all weekend to save on taxis and before any of us left on the Sunday he was getting us all added to a Whatsapp group so we could share photos and videos and keep in touch. Again, very Eliza!

Of course I haven’t forgotten M’s mum. One of the first people I saw on arrival, big welcoming smiles just as I remembered when I first met her at the hospital last year when I came down to visit you. She had a tough weekend but very much like her daughter-in-law was determined not to miss out on the party and was there, capturing everything on her phone and loving watching everyone enjoy themselves, especially the DW group rokaoke number!

And from the DWs to the RCs. Yes! I finally got to meet your family and after hearing so much about all of them all these years it was honestly like spotting celebrities when they walked in, not least because your mum looked like a star when she arrived in the fur coat you’d bought for her. Outstanding choice, she looked incredible. By the way I told Al and Ke I felt like I was meeting celebrities when they arrived, good to see I can still play it cool when meeting new people (urgh!) Oh and I told them about Cafe Pacifico and how you always took me there when I visited and you told me you gave it 4 out of 5 stars but that that was excellent as you didn’t give anywhere 5 stars as that was reserved for your mum’s cooking. They loved that.

Oh and your mum! I could have honestly sat and listened to her talk movies and you and life and everything forever. I think that’s the closest I’ll get to feeling like I’m back chatting with you. She’s just wonderful. She made D and I (and I assume everyone else she talked to) promise (multiple times) to make sure we get ourselves checked regularly and any time we have any doubts about anything. So yes, as well as film trivia and fun memories she was ensuring we were both going to look after ourselves properly…….11/10 very very Eliza!

I didn’t get a chance to speak with your Dad, but watching him slowly work his way through the rooms looking at your photos will stay definitely with me.

What else? Oh I met Ar! My goodness, what a woman! We’ve already swapped numbers and her and her daughter are coming through to mine for a craft day. We’re going to play with the cricut like you and I did and make some bags or t-shirts. Can’t wait! (quick update: as I’m writing this she’s just finished her virtual John O’Groats to Land End walk to raise money for Cancer Research - timed it to finish on your birthday) raised nearly £900 so far - fantastic.

That reminds me, my (tiny) contribution to the event planning was using my cricut to cut out little shapes of things you love or things that made me (and everyone else thankfully) think of you. They were meant as just a little extra for the flower arrangments but you know me, why make half a dozen when you can make a hundred. Anyway, everyone seemed to really love them, there were black cats (of course), books, champagne glasses, passports, music notes, cooking pots and loads of other things, not forgetting ferrets and zombies which my mother was very confused and somewhat horrified at when she saw what I was making lol. I did spot that Al had popped one of the social media heart symbols I’d made into his top pocket, that made me smile.

There’s so much more I could tell you but I’ll finish up by telling you about the most important person there, our host, M. He did so well with everything. You’d have loved seeing him chat with absolutely everyone, make sure everyone was having a blast (we were) and smiling throughout it all. He took your words to heart and it was exactly as you would have wanted. Oh and I think he taste tested every curry shop in the vicinity to find the perfect meal for us on Friday - now that’s a top host! The best bit though, and there were many to choose from was his rockaoke performance to Jumping Jack Flash, incredible! He has got all the moves, moves like Jagger more specifically - absolutely outstanding, not only setting the mood for the rest of the night but setting the bar high for all other performances. Oh and yes, he did a speech. It was perfect. We all smiled, tears in eyes, raising our glasses to you and singing happy birthday. I can just picture your smile if you’d seen it and I’m sure if you can you did.

Well I better wrap this up, even though there’s so much more I haven’t mentioned, the fireworks, the need to restock the already massive amount of prosecco after we went all harder than expected that first night, the 3am snooker games, the super tasty fiasco for Saturday lunch, the biggest bowl of (Al approved) guacamole I’ve ever seen just to name a few.

I’m going to go have a nap now, or maybe pop on a old movie and curl up on the sofa and imagine you are indeed right there on the yellow chair behind me telling me fun facts about the movie, the cast and production team. Yes, that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

Happy birthday my darling

I love you